By Daphne Fuller

You may already be aware that our thoughts and beliefs influence the way we feel and behave. The way we feel and behave influence the way that we think and the way that we behave influence our thoughts and feelings.

That was a lot right!? Read back through it a time or two and think about it.

Now, recall the last time something happened which resulted in you creating a narrative (story/thoughts), “feeling some type of way” and then acting on it? This shows how connected our thoughts, feelings and behaviors are. What if I told you that we have the ability to create more of what we want or don’t want based on the way we think, feel and behave?

Here are 3 tips you can implement to help strengthen your positive thinking muscle.

1. As they say in the Army try “Hunting the Good Stuff”. This means noticing and analyzing what is good in your life. This is important because many of us have gotten so good at hunting the bad stuff that it comes second nature. That has to stop and we are working to change that! Right? Now,list 3 things that went well today or over this past week. Please, do NOT overthink this. Recognize the small things. Maybe you did something on your to do list, slept more hours than usual, controlled your emotions when you wanted to act out or felt impulsive, had the luxury of taking a hot shower, was less stressed one or more days this past week than usual, had enough gas to make it where you needed to go, etc.

2. Be real with yourself and stop making everything such a big deal. If you know me you know one of my favorite mantras is “Not everything is an emergency”, so, chill out already. Breathe. It is NOT the end of the world. Give things time to work themselves out. Many times to get a different result we have to commit to behaving/acting differently. Instead of overthinking, going off, or sinking into a low place when you feel frustrated, overwhelmed out of control, or wanting to do the thing you know is not good for you, try implementing positive things that make you feel good. These may include journaling to dispute the unhealthy thoughts, diffusing and/or applying your favorite essential oil, taking a nice shower/bath, walking/jogging, doing a gentle yoga sequence (tons on Youtube), reading, crocheting, etc. Now, create a list of the positive and healthy things that help you feel better. Keep this with you so that the next time you find yourself losing control you can refer to it.

3. Create your own personal mantra to help you maintain your cool, uplift your mood and operate in a more positive space. Examples may include, “ I respond calmly.” “I allow things to work out.” “I know that things are working out for my good.” "I am at peace." Again, do not overthink it.

You may begin to notice that the more often you practice these three tips, the more control you will have over your life and emotions. Be easy on yourself. Feel free to share with me what you came up with.